I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Randomize