nut hugger
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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