If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
