It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
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