He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
