What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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