i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize
