So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
