I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
be right there i have to get my cape
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
