No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
this hospital has no fireball
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
