went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize