I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize