i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize
