why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
