I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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