need another drink. this is the easiest way
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
