none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
