That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize