Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Randomize