I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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