kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
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