Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
