ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
We left the knife in your bed.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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