You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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