Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Randomize
