please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
