oh god the rape fog is back!
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
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