oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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