but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize