He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
It's official drugs can't kill me
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
