Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
