I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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