In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
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