no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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