You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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