I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
