No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Is it because I queefed?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
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