Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I don't think brook has ever known best
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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