Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
