It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Randomize
