You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
