But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
