i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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