Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize