Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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