I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize