And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
