i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
it was like having sex with a tree stump
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
