P.S. I can't hear my feet
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
