Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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