It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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